The story of a girl who at the age of 14 tried heroin and went to the panel unsettled me. I know very well that many teens try grass, wheels, and hard drugs. But the truth that opens here absolutely did not want to take root in my head.
Do you know what emotions I received while reading? Outrage and perplexity. The book reveals to us the world of adolescents from Berlin 1975-1978. Kristina and her family move to the not-so-prosperous district of Berlin and discover the world of “adventures.”
What was the main reason that the teenager decided to escape from reality? Beaten father? Mother indifference? Decaying society? Lack of decent pastime? The situation in the country as a whole? Comprehensive bans? All together and individually.
Why is it considered that beating a child with a stick to bloody scars is the norm, but the fact that the child begins to try drugs is a tragedy. One smoothly follows the other. If there is a misunderstanding in the family, unwillingness to listen and hear, beatings and reproaches, then where will the child go? Outside. And it is unlikely that in this situation he will find himself a worthy company and will embark on the “true path.”
We see how the main character begins to try hashish to be in the company of “her”. Then he gradually switches to LSD and swears to himself that he will never try heroin. After all, heroin is already a line … But it’s so easy for her not to jump off. Locations, clubs, and environments are changing, but the connection with the world of drugs is only growing stronger and it will no longer be broken. Gradually, the desire for a dose becomes so unbearable that Christina goes to the panel. No, she does not sleep with men, does not even allow touching herself. There are other methods. She believed that in this way she retains the remnants of her own dignity. It turns out that Berlin in those years was a huge demand for teenage girls. And the younger you looked, the more you could earn.
Then the time came for withdrawal and the desire to die. Attempts to come off, which each time became increasingly disastrous. Lies, all around was a complete lie. But apparently the mother of Christina completely satisfied this lie. It was easier for her not to notice what was happening with her daughter. At some point, turning a blind eye to all this became impossible and she admitted to herself that her daughter had become a heroin addict. Of course, she tried to help her. I was looking for clinics, doctors, methods of getting out of this, but without the desire of Christina herself, everything was useless.
Gradually, those with whom she began her “adventures” began to die. She felt a wave of panic and once again tried to quit. I could not. She tried to end her life by suicide. Did not work out. Desperate parents left her alone. She survived and even partially returned to life. Not without the help of the mother, who still could not leave the child to the mercy of fate.
This book has it all. Drugs. Messy connections. Theft. Extortion. Body trade. Shoots. Breaking Attempts to stop. Tears of parents. Desire for a dose. One syringe at all. Attempts to make money. Attempts to get out. Drives to the police. Drugs spreading. But there is a place for true friendship and love. There is a twisted parental love. The desire to live.
You should not assume that then were difficult years and simply could not be otherwise. Now we live better, but teenagers also continue to kill themselves. Now even drugs have become more affordable. In our world of Internet addiction, it’s not difficult to find another addiction. In search of easy money, adolescents become dealers and mortgages, they try what they distribute themselves.
After reading the book, there was a feeling that you were immersed in the most vile dirt. It’s hard to get rid of these oppressive emotions. It is terrible to imagine WHAT is happening with the children and WHAT they are ready to go for their own “pleasures.” You need to read at least to understand how well we live.